Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s directorial debut Don Jon hits theaters today so to commemorate this moment in film history, I’ve written an open letter to our favorite adorable child star!
You are just so dang cute I almost can’t stand it. But I can, and I will, because man are you attractive. You are easily one of my favorite young actors in the biz right now. I feel like I’ve grown up with you, JGL. I watched you from Roseanne to Angels in the Outfield (a CLASSIC, obvi) to 10 Things I Hate About You (my personal fave) to 3rd Rock From The Sun to (500) Days of Summer (my personal least favorite, sorry guys, I’ll explain) to Inception, 50/50, Looper, and now Don Jon (and a few others in between but we don’t have all day guys)! It’s fair to say that I’m a bit of a fan of your work. You consistently deliver great performances across the board from adolescence to adulthood and I applaud you for that, good sir!
10 Things I Hate About You is not only my favorite JGL movie, it’s definitely one of my ABSOLUTE favorite movies of all time. Like, in general. I mean it’s Julia and Larisa and YOU and Heath and it’s freaking based on SHAKESPEARE so it’s basically the bestest most perfect film EVER. Everything about that movie is amazing. It speaks so truthfully to the classic teenager experience and all the stupid crap we had to put up with at that age. The film is just hilarious and heartfelt and awesome all rolled into one and I will love it forever and always. While on the subject of movies of yours I love, I just have to say that 50/50 made me cry some of the hardest tears I’ve ever cried and while I adore that movie (props to your pal Seth Rogen btw), here’s the only scenario I can voluntarily watch it in: “You know what? I would like to uncontrollably sob for two whole hours today. Oh look! 50/50 is on! How convenient!”. (Also, Anna Kendrick so.)
I guess I’ll move onto (500) Days of Summer, my least favorite JGL film. Let’s get one thing straight first, I DO NOT HATE IT, it’s just not my favsie. It’s not my least favorite because of you (OBVS, you can do no wrong JGL) and not because of Zooey or anything, it’s honestly just because I didn’t like the ending. It’s soooo cliche of me to say this and oh, I’m aware, but I just felt kinda jipped. I felt like I was taken on this amazing story of falling in-and-out-and-in again of love with the girl of this guy’s dreams and she just LEAVES?? First of all, who dumps Joseph Gordon-Levitt?!?! NO ONE SO STRIKE ONE, SUMMER. Second of all, I guess I just felt kind of cheated out of this awesome stereotypical love story ending after trekking through all the sh*t Tom had to put up with. I know, I’m THE WORST. I’m assuming that was the whole point, to not have this wonderful fairy tale ending everyone is most likely expecting and I bet that’s probably the whole reason why most people actually love it. I guess I’m just the one rando who wasn’t into it. I resented Summer for putting Tom through all this horrible stuff and then being like, oh yeah BYE. So, to each their own I guess but PLS DON’T HATE ME JGL (and readers, ya know I love ya).
Back to YOU, JGL. You’re just the sweetest, most talented, smooth crooning, Zooey D. BFF, child star cutie on the planet. I’m a fan of everything you do, onscreen and off and will support you for days to come. Whether you’re the long-haired baby-faced 3rd Rock alien child star I grew up with or the clean-cut sexy big time movie director you’ve become, I’ll be here til the very end. Keep killing it, JGL!
Here’s to 20 years of love and counting (in the non-creepiest way possible),
Fraisia W. Logan